Email Blackout


When email came about and caught on with the general public about 10 years ago, relationships as we knew it in the old school days were redefined and reshaped. Prior to the popularity of the internet, relationships were mainly built upon face to face interactions and written correspondence via snail mail, and eventually on gabbing over the phone. With email as a new function to communicate, the old school tools for communication were often replaced, tolerating a more distant and yet seemingly more intimate correspondence. Not too long ago, I read an article about a study that showed how people today spend many hours in front of the computer, communicating and "building relationships" through the internet, an intangible space somehow exhibited and materialzed on a monitor. The study also revealed an interesting character of the human psyche - how people seem to be more honest and readily trusting of others when communicating over funcions such as emailing and even instant messaging than face to face or phone conversations. So I wondered and even analyzed a little on why that is, why people who recently were skeptical of disclosing personal information over the internet now seemed more trusting of it than interpersonal communication. And then I examined my own communication and my own readiness to divulge info over the internet versus the old school tools. At times I found myself abusing the function and purpose of email, as well as other rapid forms of internet communication. Somehow revealing certain inner thoughts or personal info over email to someone far away seemed safer, maybe because I felt less vulnerable b/c s/he is "out there". Perhaps that goes back to the idea of the internet, a reality that we can turn on and off, a reality that exists "out there", a reality from which we can distant ourselves at any time. Again, the function of email is for easy access and quick communication, especially in this time and age when people are constantly busy, on the go, and connected with others in further distances. I caught myself using email to correspond with people who lived in the same city as me on a regular basis... basically, i let email replace the phone as well as good intentions to meet up with folks. Maybe I am just old school, but I feel that email is impersonal. I do like emailing a whole lot... I cannot remember life without it... and I enjoy shooting a friend a quick email just to say hello or share a funny story... and I like how I can keep in touch with people far away, esp those who are not phone people... but I do not like how email condones our business and the downward spiral of interpersonal skills. Also, I do not like how the tone of reading and writing emails easily can be misconstrued, leading to unnecessary tension, misunderstanding, assumptions, and/or unknown intentions. Hence, I am going through an email fast/blackout/hiatus of some sorts. I will be keeping my email writing to a minimal... in place of writing emails, I look forward to being more intentional in my communication by making use of the phone and face to face time. Of course I still read emails! Hopefully, my intent for intentional communication will not cause my phone bill to sky rocket...